Day 1 [Written 3/23/09]

The first day was incredibly difficult. As much as I feel like I can stand on my own two feet, my knees buckle in with hurt. By now, his whole family knows; *Andrew [his older brother who never liked me; name changed] is probably throwing a party as we know it. Now that I think about it, the look on Alex's face when I tried to talk to him made him look exactly like Andrew.
I deserve better than that but the question is: will I ever find better? Probably not but the wounds are still fresh. I at least ate something today, despite my will.
This just hurts. I sooo want to stay under the covers for a long time. Maybe forever.